I of course know that the day will come that to LatteGirl, the day that I will no longer be cool. But with less than a month until her 7th birthday, I was certain that I still had some time left. Apparently not. It seems nobody filled me in on a little secret.
I had assumed that the swap from cool to uncool would be like ripping off a Band-AidÂ®, painful but quick. It would hurt briefly but then be done. **
However, I discovered that this is not the case. It seems that this will be a slow painful slide into obsolecense, and it has already begun. The first sign came this past weekend, when we discussing things to do this summer and such. We usually plan and try to go see a few shows over at the Continental Airlines Arena each year, but it was already obvious that some things like, Sesame Street Live were now a thing of the past, and that we would have to find something new to fill that void. TheWife mentioned a few things which were all turned town, and then she brought up what she thought for sure was going to be the winner, High School Musical : The Ice Tour.
At this point she tired of us, and our ideas, and quite emphatically informed us that Mommy would be taking her to see Hannah Montana in concert this year, and that she would be happy to forego anything else, in order to go to this (theoretical) concert.
Not that I wasn’t happy that TheWife was selected as the chosen one to endure a concert with thousands of screaming near-tweens, tween, and perhaps a few teens, but I was curious as to why she made it declarative in that way. I had to know (or so I thought at that point in time), so I asked, “Do I get to go too? Or can I take you instead of Mommy if her schedule and the concert have a conflict?”
She just looked at me. Not really confused, as much as confounded that I could actually ask such an imbecilic question. “Of course not! Duuuuuuuh! It is a girl thing. You just wouldn’t understand. Right Mom?”
I’m not sure what was more painful at that moment. The beginning of my obsolescence, or the pained look on TheWife’s face, and she tried to figure out the right thing to say that that moment. At least hers was brief, and the pain was gone shortly. Me however, I have a feeling that this is only the beginning of my pain.
** [After consulting with my editors and attorney’s I must point out that the Band-Aid brand of adhesive bandages is a registered trademark of the Johnson & Johnson company, and that the previous cliche, should in fact point to a more generic and lower quality adhesive bandage (which of course must also rule out Curad brand as well, since they are “Ouchless”). We apologize for our careless use of cliche, and hope that the corporations with really expensive lawyers understand that there was no malicious intent, real or implied, nor did we intent to slander or libelously intend to dilute the value of the Band-Aid brand, Johnson and Johnson, their family of companies. Apology void in AZ, HI, and the Commonweath of Guam]